Create More Stillness in Your Life and It’s Not Champagne Bubbles that Come to the Surface

unplugMindfulness.

What does it mean to be mindful? There are lots of ways to be mindful but for me lately it’s coming up simply as awareness.

I want to notice the small things in life, the little exquisite ‘beauties’ in life – that’s where the joy is and I don’t want to be too busy to miss out.

So

I’ve been trying to implement more mindful moments.

Seeing as I actually looked up the symptoms for adult ADD just last week you can imagine this slowing down doesn’t come naturally for me and maybe it doesn’t for you either.

I’ve been walking away from my office and sitting and drinking my coffee without my phone near by – doing nothing, at least for a few minutes.

Sitting on my porch yesterday and feeling the sun on my face so deeply that it choked me up.

The more time I take the more I feel ‘feelings’ bubble up.

Some of those feelings aren’t so pleasant or pretty. Or easy to let you see. I’ve been feeling jealous of people that have been travelling for spring break; their pics on the beach in the warm sun, taking a break from work, all making me feel envious. I don’t normally feel like this.

I saw someone walking her dog – she was walking so SLLLLOOOOOWWWW and I felt irritated. I thought, ‘who has time for that?’

My immediate answer, ‘People, who are clearly awesome and perhaps way more evolved than me, have time for that’. Gulp.

I warned you it’s not all a bed of roses growing in my mind.

But it’s where my truth lies and if I really want more joy it’s what needs to be tended to. Busyness, discipline, military style inner voices keep that awareness from coming to the forefront and keep us from living, fulfilling lives.

I’m not into that and I imagine you aren’t either.

Lately I feel drawn to not work, to play, to explore, to relax more, and to be a fairy dust throwing love spreader, if I was to be honest.

I want less routine, I want less rules, I want less inner critics who try to convince me that I’ll be starving to death by the end of the month if I follow the path of what I long for.

Who are we kidding, these inner voices lie A LOT.

They say it will be over by the end of the week. It’s not true and constantly I’m drawn to spaciousness but I honour that in very specific ways and mostly to avoid growing more brain tumours like walks and short, very timed naps.

I don’t know what ‘play’ looks like – the last time I had a desire to play I started a non profit and while I love that wee Joy Sock baby of mine, its not so playful as its grown into toddlerhood, and I’m not about to start anything big.

I don’t do lunches or coffees. My week is very planned and strategic and I told my daughter yesterday that I was having the best day because I was doing laundry during a work day and it was making me very joyful.

LAUNDRY DURING a WORK DAY brought me joy?! She had a similar reaction.

That’s great, but also feels deeply odd and part of the reason was that I never let myself do that. I work from home and have become super disciplined to get everything I need to get done and to maybe deep down inside prove that I am enough and to stop my financial worries that these businesses of mine will dry up and I will be handing out Joy Socks on the street that I live on (out of a cardboard box – my fears are BIG and I recognize: odd☺).

So space and more mindfulness are great and also awkward.

I believe that in the stillness of our lives, lies the truth of what we truly want and what we truly need. I also believe that the universe has a wee bit of weirdness for us all to follow so that we can shine our light in only a way that we can AND celebrate our own brand of nonconformity and joyfull badassery.

I’m into that.

So I’m mixing things up, I’m taking longer breaks and went to a local boutique last week between clients – so yum. I went out of town to lead a workshop and took myself out for dinner and even went out for a glass of wine after one of the evening sessions and it’s so quickly made me feel more at ease and happier.

If you allowed more stillness in your life, what might bubble up for you? What would you do to honour you?

I know I always want more truth in my life, I want more stillness and I always want more joy. So I’m committing to connecting more deeply to being more aware of what’s bubbling up around me and being available for what’s there. I don’t know what will happen, but I’d love some company, will you join me?

Leona deVinne